SHOCK: Will Elon Musk join Mark Zuckerberg in Mykonos?
Said one well-placed source, "We just don't know."
The world's richest dudes are seldom impervious to the charms of Greece's premier holiday island…
Maybe Elon Musk didn’t stay long enough last time? A couple summers ago the world’s richest creep, uh, man, touched down at that most glamorous of the Greek islands, Mykonos.
While some may have expected Muskers to swoop in via a luxury, solar-powered Tesla submarine prototype, he actually used a Gulfstream jet likely running on good, old-fashioned oil — you know, the kind behind much of the current Western saber-rattling in Iran but let’s leave that onefor another overpriced glass wine at Butterworth’s. As Elon landed, it was widely reported, he sported a fake-humble T-shirt and sunglasses.
Elon’s apparently still got no yacht of his own, but may have rented one to poke about the Cycladic island’s numerous secluded coves and bays.
As for Mark Zuckerberg, what he lacks in some important departments he makes up for, or tries, in boat sizes. His bigass yacht recently emerged from the lower depths of billionaire Hades to turn up in mesmerizing Malta, then sailed for Greece. Where’s the big tacky thing headed now, Mykonos? Maybe.
Mykonos is Greece the way Manhattan is America: officially yeah, but not quite. Mykonos is not the most beautiful island to grace the Greek seas, but the summertime atmosphere is unique. Any given day in July or August could be described as feeling like World War III is about to break out (wait, has it?) or has just ended, with a heady mix of wind, heat, too loud music, and unbridled exuberance, cheapened though it is by the advent of awful corporate “luxury” brands like Louis Vuitton and Dior. Which have about as much business being in Mykonos as Elon Musk does in Washington, D.C.
Wait, wasn’t Muskers booted from swampy D.C.? Sure seemed like it. So, again, will the South African irritant be joining Zuck in Mykonos soon, off the radar the way Zucky likes it, or perhaps they will rendezvous in Venice for the ostentatious and totally unnecessary Bezos-Sanchez nuptials that makes most Venetians want to puke into the Grand Canal?
Who can say?
Anyway, traveling to Mykonos in summer is not without some unconventional perils. Have an amazin’ grazin’ lunch at a trendy beach club like one called Nammos and you risk being drenched by a “champagne shower” — an island custom of dubious charm wherein people splash about bottles of the bubbly for strictly celebratory purposes, with no intention of actually taking a sip. True, the wait staff is trained to hold up beach blankets (embossed with the club logo, of course) to make sure nearby diners keep dry, but at the end of the day it is your dry cleaning bill, not theirs.
If you’re just about anyone other than Elon Musk, there is also the risk that you could go broke. The absence of Russian oligarchs lately has not done much, if anything, to reduce the price of traditional Mykonos musts like sumptuous meals at breezy seaside tavernas.
Hotel room inventory tends to go fast in summer. A “deluxe double sea room” at the Wild Hotel on a Tuesday or Thursday in July could set you back around $600, and a suite slightly north of $1,000.
Having visited that property a year ago, this reporter can confirm that the price includes a positively sybaritic breakfast, taken al fresco above a private curl of beach.
The Wild’s sandy cove, incidentally, is right around the corner from the larger beach of Agia Anna, where Mr. Musk was photographed wearing that “macho” khaki T-shirt as he stepped aboard a small boat that may have been spiriting him to a nearby yacht.
Mykonos has a surprising number of excellent beaches relative to its size, which at 33 square miles is about thrice the area of Fire Island. The sandier and more popular beaches are all on the south side. The northern ones tend to be more pebbly and are tough to get to without a car. Yet it’s worth making the effort for beautiful spots like Panormos — which is great for windsurfing — Ftelia, and Agios Sostis. The rocky cove of Fokos is home to an off-radar but well-regarded taverna, and you can swim in the translucent blue water with nary a beachside DJ to be heard, nor a superyacht in sight.
If money is no object, you can have a great time in Mykonos no matter how crowded the summer sees the place get. It is also possible to do some sun-splashed shopping around the whitewashed alley ways of Chora, the main town, and enjoy the special vibe of a Mykonian beach club over the course of a day or two even in high season.
The smart money says wait a little, though. By the middle of September, most of those big boats and the obnoxious people on board them have crawled back to California or New York, and having Mykonos to yourself can be a treat. You might even want to start planning your vacay now, before Elon Musk and Zuckster theHuckster steal even more…headlines (and such).